First Impressions: Windows Live

Ever since I placed one of my e-mail address so visibly at the top of this blog, I’ve been waiting for the spam to come rolling in. I’m very pleased to say that the first batch was quite creatively done and targeted, so well done to whoever that was.

Signing me up to Windows Live was presumably an attempt at making me baulk / realise that for some reason it doesn’t work with Mac – when (in case you don’t know) it absolutely does, which is really the first of it’s many big problems.

From the moment you sign up (which takes far too long) you get the distinct impression Microsoft are trying to polish a turd. Constantly clicking to try and find something worth using, but never finding anything except that awful corporate Microsoft blue splashed everywhere and distracting advert banner GIF’s from 1990 telling me how great Windows Live is.. ..honest!

It’s been a while since I looked at Hotmail, so I’ll try there, see what changes have been made – except no, wait – what’s this? I can’t use Hotmail because I need to sign up for it? Well, I thought I just did?

Hmm, ok – we’ll move on to this thing called Spaces then shall we? Dear Christ. What a horrible looking thing this is. Invite a friend to use what exactly? Where else do I click to find out what I’m inviting them too, please?

OK, share photos then, here we go. Are you kidding me? THIS is what the world’s largest software monopoly call a serious stab at beating Yahoo’s Flickr? You’ve got to be taking the piss, right?

Seven manual upload buttons? You are having a fucking laugh. Have you never heard of Flash? Oh that’s right, we have to use Silverlight now, don’t we. Jesus titty fucking shit.

MICROSOFT!! You’re just not listening are you? This sucks more than a sucky thing that’s just come back from evening classes in how to suck more than anything else has ever sucked before, with a first class diploma with honours tucked under it’s arm.

  • I can’t log into the only thing that used to work sort-of OK before without signing up twice
  • None of the buttons are in the same place from one page to the next, leaving me utterly lost from the moment I make the mistake of signing up in the first place
  • It doesn’t do anything
  • It’s dog slow
  • It’s ugly enough to make MySpace look like an Apple product
  • This isn’t your pathetic Operating System, so why bury esoteric does nothing control panels three menus deep, just because I want to change the colour scheme?

I can’t do it any more, that’s it. I’m outta here.

Thanks SO much to whoever signed me up for a trial, it was humorous, but my overriding impression is that someone from Microsoft seriously needs to look at how productivity and communication web applications should be done properly, and they might start by looking here…

http://www.apple.com/mobileme/

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